Wednesday, May 6, 2009

Things might be a little different around here

Practically from day one of my blogging "career," I've been very aware of the potential to upset people, offend them, or hurt their feelings. I think I may have taken things to the extreme, because while I've been careful, most of the time, to do none of those things, I have managed to suppress some of the better or, at least more interesting, parts of me. I think I may have given people the impression that I'm some kind of Pollyanna or Goody-Two-Shoe. I've kept my mouth shut about a lot of topics that are important to me because I know there are people out there who could be offended, just knowing that I feel this way. Instead, I write about knitting, or other crafts, about books or movies. All of these are real; I don't make up anything. But I suppress a LOT.

But you know what? No one is sitting back, worrying about not offending or upsetting me. Other people don't seem to have a problem sitting back and announcing that their way is the only way and that everyone else is a moron, or going to hell, or both.

I don't plan on doing anything that would intentionally hurt someone's feelings, but beyond that... I'm done. If this means that no one reads my blog anymore, so be it. If people are allowed to promote their religion, belief system, food choice, etc., than so am I.

I'm tired of hearing about how all "the gays" have an "agenda" and are out to force everyone to be gay. Feel free to boycott Pepsi because they won't "stay neutral" in the culture war, but dude, if the AFA boycotts Pepsi, I'm going to start buying Pepsi even if I actually prefer Coke. There is no "homosexual agenda" to convert us all. No companies are forcing their employees to BE gay. They are asking their employees to stop harassing their co-workers because of their sexual orientation. Hardly the same thing.

Quoting John, because this pretty much boils it down:

"Collectivizing individuals into a group and attributing to them an agenda is nothing more than a means of dehumanizing people you disagree with. Saying 'I am against the GAY AGENDA' isn't as controversial as saying 'I HATE BOB BECAUSE HE'S GAY.' or 'I WON'T DO BUSINESS WITH SALLY BECAUSE SHE HAS A GIRLFRIEND.'

"It's just another way of not treating people as individuals, which in my book, would be called 'A Non Optimal Solution'"

I'm straight, but have absolutely no issues with anyone who wants to live their life with someone of the same sex, and I think that if they are willing to make a legal commitment, they should be able to. A lesbian or gay couple that wants to make their commitment legal doesn't affect my marriage any more than an abusive asshole who beats his wife and kids getting to be married does. And, if people want to hook up without getting married, it doesn't affect me any more or less if they're straight or gay.

I'm still going to have craft content, because I'm a crafty person. And I'm still going to post about books and movies, because those are things I'm interested in. But I'm also going to post about other topics that spring to mind. If this makes things difficult for you, I'll understand if you stop reading. I hope you'll stay, so we can learn from each other, but we all have to do what we have to do.

Mel

PS: Adding the following - I just want to clarify that, to date, all of the censorship has been self-inflicted. This thinking of everyone else before me has been something I've been trying to overcome for years. I matter. My feelings matter. And it's up to me to take care of me. Also, there is nothing here directed at any one person, or even a group of people.

4 comments:

Jennifer said...

Way to tell it like it is!

pixiesinthehouse said...

This is YOUR blog and you should be able to express yourself as you wish! Amen to your direct words. I'm behind you 100%...and will keep reading your posts!

gwensmom said...

Preach it, sister. I'll keep reading.

Nancy G said...

I think I'll be liking your blog even more, now!